Tony Alessandra, Ph.D.
When I was in high school back in 1960′s, everyone always divided themselves into self-contained, often exclusive, groups. These groups followed all the old clichés — you had your greasers, your jocks, your nerds, your college prep kids, and your vocational kids — and everyone was always careful to stay within their own group.
Although I was technically in the athletic group (or jocks) and the college prep group, I always tried to go out of my way to get along with everyone — no matter what group they were associated with. I always got good grades, so I fit in with the smart kids. I was born and raised in New York City, so I got along with the greasers. I tried to find my connection with everyone, which was not hard at all. After all, we were all high school kids — we had plenty to bond over with the shared experience of going to the same school.
However, the reason that I was able to build on those commonalities — the reason people from other groups were friendly back to me — was that I treated everyone with respect. I never gossiped about the popular crowd, never teased or taunted the nerds. I made an effort to see everyone’s positive aspects, and I focused on those. In essence, I treated others the way they wanted to be treated, and it gave me the ability to adapt and be liked by just about everybody.
I have carried that philosophy throughout my whole life: I am as polite to a janitor as a CEO. As people, they both exist on the same level — and both deserve the same amount of outward respect.
My mantra: “What goes around, comes around.”
What do you have “coming around” for yourself?
